Helping Kids Manage Back-to-School Anxiety
- Carolyn Watkins
- Aug 27
- 4 min read
Helping Kids Manage Back-to-School Anxiety
It’s hard to believe—it’s already back-to-school time! While some children can’t wait to grab their new backpacks and see friends again, others face a wave of nerves as the first day approaches. Back-to-school anxiety is common, especially during big transitions like starting kindergarten, entering middle school, or moving up to a new grade.
Why Do Kids Feel Nervous?
Anxiety can look different for every child. Some may cling at drop-off, cry, or have tantrums. Others might complain of stomachaches or headaches. Worries often center around:
Meeting a new teacher
Making friends
Finding their classroom
Being away from parents
While it’s tempting to let them stay home until they “feel ready,” avoiding school can make the fear stronger. Consistent attendance helps build confidence, social connections, and emotional resilience. The goal isn’t to remove the challenge—it’s to equip kids with tools to face it.
3 Practical Strategies to Ease the Transition
1. Create Stability
A predictable routine makes kids feel safe. Start adjusting bedtime and wake-up schedules at least a week before school starts. Lay out clothes and prep lunch the night before to keep mornings calm.
2. Talk It Out
Ask open-ended questions like:“What’s one thing you’re excited about and one thing that makes you nervous?”Listen without judgment, validate their feelings, and remind them that being nervous is normal.
3. Problem-Solve Together
Instead of just saying, “You’ll be fine,” help them plan.
Nervous about finding their classroom? Practice asking for help.
Unsure about making friends? Brainstorm icebreaker questions.
Problem-solving builds confidence and gives kids a sense of control.
Parental involvement encourages success in communication
Anxious feelings can show up in different ways. Some kids may cling to you at drop-off, cry, or have tantrums. Others might complain of stomachaches, headaches, or feeling “sick” in the morning. Common worries often center around meeting a new teacher, making friends, finding their place in class, or being away from their parents.
While it’s tempting to let your child skip school until they “feel ready,” avoiding school actually reinforces their fears. Consistent attendance helps them build confidence, make social connections, and continue their academic and emotional growth. The key is not to remove the challenge but to equip them with tools to face it.
Here are some practical strategies to ease your child’s transition into the school year:
Here is another great way to transition back to school
1. Focus on the basics. In times of change, stability is essential. A consistent bedtime, healthy meals, and a predictable routine help children feel more secure. Start easing back into the school schedule at least a week before the first day—this means setting wake-up and bedtime hours closer to the school year’s demands. Simple steps like laying out clothes the night before or packing lunch in the evening can help mornings run smoothly, reducing stress for everyone.
2. Encourage open conversation. Make space for your child to share what’s on their mind. You might say, “What’s one thing you’re excited about for school, and one thing that worries you?” Listen without rushing to correct or dismiss their fears. Let them know it’s normal to feel nervous about new situations and that you believe they have what it takes to adjust. Sometimes, just being heard can ease half the burden.
3. Problem-solve together, not just reassure. It’s natural to want to say, “You’ll be fine!” but reassurance alone doesn’t give kids a plan for when challenges arise. Instead, work with them to think through possible scenarios and solutions. If they’re worried about finding their classroom, role-play what they might say to a teacher or peer. If making friends feels intimidating, brainstorm ways to introduce themselves or join a group activity. This approach builds their problem-solving skills and gives them a sense of control.
Transitions can be tough, but with preparation, patience, and support, your child can build the resilience they need to navigate new experiences—not just at school, but in life.
Books That Help Ease Back-to-School Anxiety
Reading stories about characters who face and overcome fears can reassure kids they’re not alone. Here are some great picks:
Tomorrow’s Trailblazer by Carolyn Watkins – A heartwarming story about embracing change and finding courage when everything feels new.
I Don’t Want to Move! by Carolyn Watkins – Perfect for kids coping with big changes like moving or starting at a new school.
The Day You Begin by Jacqueline Woodson – A beautiful book about finding your voice in unfamiliar spaces.
Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes – A relatable story for kids who worry about everything, especially school.
School’s First Day of School by Adam Rex – A fun twist on back-to-school jitters—from the school’s perspective!
Reading these books together opens the door for meaningful conversations about feelings, resilience, and confidence.
As the school year unfolds, celebrate small victories, like meeting a new friend or trying something new in class. Each step forward is proof that they are learning, growing, and finding their way.
Quick Parent Checklist for Back-to-School Confidence
✅ Start bedtime and wake-up routines early.
✅ Prep clothes and lunch the night before.
✅ Ask open-ended questions about school feelings.
✅ Acknowledge and normalize their worries.
✅ Role-play problem-solving scenarios.
✅ Celebrate small wins to build confidence.
Remember
Transitions can be tough, but with preparation, patience, and support, your child can build the resilience they need to navigate new experiences—not just at school, but in life. Celebrate small victories along the way, like meeting a new friend or trying something new in class. Each step forward shows growth and confidence.